When the Supreme Court announced its 5 – 4 decision a little over a week ago to legalize same-sex marriage in all 50 states, news and social media sites lit up with celebrations in the name of love.
I felt sorrow. I know many of you did, too.
Our sorrow may confuse or even infuriate those who know us.
How can you, followers of a loving God, not celebrate when men and women across the country are free at last to express their love?
While I’m sure some want to trump and trap those of us who hold to an orthodox Christian worldview, I think most ask questions like this with sincerity, trying to make sense of us. How can you be against . . . love?
And I think many within the church are stumped by the question, too. We look at gay couples who seem to love as well as the rest of us, we talk with gay friends and wonder, Have I been getting this wrong all along? Am I on the wrong side of history?
Confusion abounds from without and within our Christian circles.
Our sorrow is not because love has triumphed, but because we believe something else masquerading as love has. Christianity teaches that sin is any way we pull away from God and plug into another source, it’s any attempt to be our own gods, beginning with the idea we can know right and wrong on our own. The first sin looked like eating a piece of fruit, after all.
Sin can look religious or profane, deadly or benign, heartless or romantic, horrid or beautiful, hateful or loving. This includes sex between two people of the same gender. It also includes . . .
- Lust that uses another person for its own sexual gratification.
- Strong feelings that stir a woman to leave her husband and kids for another man.
- Words whispered by a teenage guy compelling a girl to have sex with him.
- “Love the sinner, hate the sin” spoken from a distance, apart from real self-sacrificing relationship.
So where do we go from here? What are followers of Christ to do in light of the Supreme Court’s ruling? Here are several things I’m trying to do. I hope they’ll be helpful to you:
- When I get confused about what love is, I do best not to look at anyone else at all, but to gaze directly at Christ on the cross and to let Him gaze upon me. The cross reminds me that the wages of sin is death. No matter how romantic or how religious it looks, sin enslaves and destroys. And we all alike need to be rescued from it.
- Second, I spend time at the cross because Jesus’ love manifested there exposes my love as paltry and small. Compared with His, my love is a wispy and fleeting little thing. Sometimes it’s exposed as no love at all, but as hunger, greed, or self-seeking. This is a bitter pill and a narrow way. But I need to let my little love be assumed into the body of Christ, and to die with Him, that it might be raised new and good and real, like His.
- The Supreme Court’s ruling reminds me I’m an alien and stranger here. The Court has also made rulings advancing no-fault divorce, pornography, and the killing of babies in their mothers’ wombs. Somehow in the midst of this, I grow comfortable and put pursuing an American dream over living for Christ as a citizen of His unseen Kingdom. This is an opportunity to choose again this day whom I will serve.
- As concerns for religious freedoms tempt me to anxiety or fear, I’m seeking to accept afresh the clear teaching of Scripture that those who follow Christ will be misunderstood, hated, and suffer as He did. No, I don’t mean thinking of myself as a victim or martyr (there’s a subtle self-righteousness that can come that way), but that as I look to the future, I don’t need to fear. Jesus and His faithful ones have gone before us. We are free to take our eyes off ourselves and instead choose to love.
- With this in mind, Love Himself requires me to engage relationally instead of just talking from a distance about or down to those who disagree with me. I want to practice laying down my life sacrificially for those around me, even those with whom I disagree. This is what Love did and does. His love within me will call me to do no less.
Now is not the time to slumber. Now is the time to awake, repent, and follow.
If I could ask one thing of you, it would be this: Please pray for and walk with our brothers and sisters who experience homosexual attractions and who are choosing to submit those feelings to Christ. They need our salient friendship now as much as ever.
Jesus, may we come to love like You.
In the name of love,
It’s the tale of a nobody who ends up being something incredibly special.
It’s the tale of Harry Potter, Mia Thermopolis, Alex Stowe, Clark Kent, John Connor, Peter Parker, Thomas Anderson, Luke Skywalker, Bilbo Baggins.
I think we’re drawn to these characters not simply out of some greedy hope that we’ll make it big one day, but because somewhere inside, like a distant memory, we do relate with them.
It’s right that you should feel this way.
As a man or a woman, the image of God is stamped into your body. This means, in all of creation, God has given man and woman an honored roll, a beloved place in the Story he’s writing. He formed your being as a man or as a woman to image (to express, reveal, manifest) something of who God is to all of creation.
You women bear a likeness to God that no other creature in all of creation does. And men, you bear God’s likeness in a way no other creature in all of creation does. Women don’t bear God’s image like men do, and men can’t bear God’s image like women do.
In God’s design, this isn’t a threatening notion to either men or women. It’s a reason for esteem.
If women bear God’s image upon the earth in ways no other creature (including men) can, then how could we not honor women and seek their flourishing that God’s image may flourish upon the earth?
And if men bear God’s image upon the earth in ways no other creature (including women) can, then how could we not honor men and seek their flourishing that God’s image may flourish upon the earth?
(Unless of course, we want to see less of God, forget him, lose any sense of him.)
It’s frustrating to write about this. To my reading, my own words don’t do justice to the dignity that is intended for us as male and female.
But maybe that’s part of the point. God didn’t just say something about who he is. He manifested it in our bodies.
It makes sense why we find ourselves drawn to stories, movies, and songs about a nobody who becomes someone spectacular.
The incarnation of Christ was, in a very real way, like the point in the story when Clarisse tells Mia she is the Princess, when Obi Wan tells Luke he will become a Jedi like his father, when Jonathon Kent showed Clark the space capsule he arrived in, when Morpheus tells Neo he’s “the One,” when Hagrid tells Harry he’s a wizard, when Aslan tells the Pevensies they’re to be kings and queens in Narnia.
What are some of your favorite stories of a nobody who eventually is shown to be someone spectacular? I’d love to hear.
When I slow down enough to look closely, I marvel at God’s choices in the design of the universe. I mean, it’s not like he pulled all this out of an Ikea box and followed step-by-step drawings to put everything together.
He created from scratch, with infinite possibilities before him.
How did he come up with breath? Why did he choose blue for the sky? Did he ever consider a different sound for an ocean wave?
And why did he link sex and new life?
Think about that for a minute. By God’s intentional design, perhaps the most euphoric sensation a man or woman can feel on the planet is connected to conception, the start of every new life.
- He could have made it so babies would grow from trees like fruit. If you wanted a baby, you’d plant a baby tree, wait a few years, and then one summer you’d find out just how many babies you had.
- He could have designed it so babies would mysteriously wash in from the ocean and couples would make pilgrimage to the shore to become parents.
- Or, of course, he could have opted for storks to collect babies from clouds and hand (um, beak) deliver them to waiting parents below.
He had endless possibilities, and he created men’s and women’s bodies to fit together physically, for that union to feel incredibly good, and for it to be the miraculous ground from which a new human being would begin.
In a pornified culture, it’s easy to miss this. Easy to shy away from any hint of implicating God with nakedness, kissing, penetration, and climax. This is stuff Christians don’t think about, right?
But this is God’s design, his idea. If anyone should be talking about such things, it’s those who believe in a loving, intentional, involved Creator God.
The truth is, he’s not embarrassed by how good sex feels. And he’s not embarrassed about where babies come from. He thought it up, designed every detail, created every part on purpose with something special in mind.
If we push God away from all this, we miss that God designed it this way to tell us something. We’re created in his image, after all. We can look at our design, and if we’ll accept it, discover something about him.
In this case, I think we’re supposed to glimpse how joyous, how ecstatic he feels about creating us. Sex between husband and wife is meant to be an experiencing of this glimpse into his heart for people.
I can’t help but wonder what our disconnection from this has done to our own sense of worth, dignity, and inherent beauty.
I can’t help but wonder what might be different if every child grew up with a felt sense that they came about from a mom and a dad who love the heck out of each other, and from an infinite God who was euphoric thinking about the day his or her life would begin.
Glad you’re here,
Sunday morning amidst our pre-church grabbing for breakfast, combing hair, clearing the table, and searching for lost shoes, a girl walked down the stairs and into our dining room.
It wasn’t that she called attention to herself. She didn’t. She didn’t even say anything. She just walked unassumingly into the room, stood tall and slender, wearing a simple dress, arms falling gently at her sides, long brown hair falling just as gently over her shoulders.
And for a moment, just a moment, I swear I lost my breath.
How does a dad slow the world down so he can take in that his little girl is becoming a young woman? How does he fathom the wonder she is?
All I could do was stop and look and utter, “You. Look. Beautiful.”
I couldn’t find anything else to say. I wanted to. Man, I wanted something more to say. How can a father fill his words with more than just sound, so they’ll not just reach her ears but nourish her heart, too?
It’s moments like these I’m keenly aware of two things: First, time escapes us, like air from a balloon. You wake up one morning and realize something’s gone and won’t ever come back. For all that’s welcome and wonderful about today, time gone by isn’t ours to retrieve. The train only goes forward.
Second, I know so little about real living. And real loving. I can talk a good game, but my love falls so short.
What’s a man to do when his heart isn’t big enough to offer his little-girl-now-growing-into-a-young-woman all he wishes for her? All he believes she needs?
No matter what I try, a gap remains between what I want for her and what I can give her. This isn’t a cop out. I’m not talking about checking out or making excuses for not giving this girl all I’ve got. I’m talking about the gap between the time I want with her and the time I have that’s so quickly passing, the gap between the love I want for her and the faltering love I find I have to give to her.
The gap is painful.
Even when I do my best, re-up my commitment to not missing a moment (just like so many voices urged me when she was a baby in my arms at the grocery store).
But in moments like these, I can’t ignore, can’t numb the reality the gap is still here. And it hurts.
But here’s the thing: I’m not sure I want the gap to go away. I think maybe it’s supposed to be there. And I’m supposed to feel it.
I think it’s supposed to point me beyond myself to search afresh for One who has all of time, One who gives all His love for her.
I want to turn my pain into prayer. Less striving for perfect me and more trusting in perfect Him.
I think I’m supposed to feel the pain of the gap. And I think she is, too.
Because here’s the other thing: I don’t want her satisfied with what I’ve got. Or anyone else for that matter. I want her to walk right up to the gap, face it square, stand tall and look searchingly through it for a Love that’s bigger than the world has to offer.
Oh, I love my girl. But my love is just a glimmering reflection on a puddle. I want her to ache for a vast ocean and an endless sun.
Minding the gap,
Porn is a scourge not just around us culturally, but among us in the church. And although not always visible on a typical Sunday morning, the damage porn does is nonetheless very real and very severe. It erodes and replaces our view of man, woman, sex, marriage, and love.
But porn isn’t inevitable. We can live free from it. For the sake of us all, we must.
Here are seven practices I’ve found to be incredibly helpful in my life and in the lives of other men and women who have decided to leave porn behind.
- Choose light. If you’re serious about getting it out of your life, you have to get serious about living in the light. Find a few trustworthy and supportive brothers or sisters who you can share your actions, thoughts, feelings, and temptations with on at least a weekly basis.
- Recognize your main problem is lust, not porn. Believing you can defeat porn but hold onto lust is like believing you can parallel park going sixty. For the person struggling to quit porn, a little lust is like a little sip of booze for an alcoholic.
- Learn your patterns. If you’ve developed a porn habit, you’ve developed patterns leading to it. Some are obvious (e.g. temptation hits when you surf the Internet by yourself late at night). Others are subtle but equally important (e.g. temptation hits Thursday afternoons, after work, or when you’re feeling nervous, lonely, or unattractive). Learning your patterns gives you a heads up that temptation’s likely so you can take evasive action before it hits.
- Take care of yourself. Porn is most often an attempt to meet a legitimate need in an illegitimate way. It serves either as a drug to numb pain (e.g. you’re exhausted after a hard week and porn offers some relief) or as an artificial filler that temporarily gives an illusion of meeting a need (e.g. you’re lonely and longing for comfort and porn makes you feel embraced and comforted.) Those who break free from the porn habit have learned to regularly and consistently take good care of themselves – heart, mind, body, and soul.
- Cultivate authentic closeness with others. This is easier said than done. Relationship is some of the most challenging soil to tend on the planet. Healthy relationships take time, vulnerability, risk, sacrifice, energy, and so much more. And after all that, even the best relationships are vulnerable to changes in schedules, career, family, and health issues. Porn beckons with a “risk-free” alternative that’s always available. Those who break free and continue to walk free of porn know it’s essential to keep working at authentic, deep relationships no matter what.
- Return to the Cross readily and regularly. The Cross of Christ was never meant to be a one-time destination. It’s not just the doorway into life, it’s the source of intimate union with God Himself. The Cross is where God in the flesh gave His body fully to us that our bodies would be rescued from sin. And if you’ve ever felt in your body the powerful enticement of porn, you know how much your body needs to be rescued. The Cross of Christ can become for you not just the source of forgiveness when you fall (which it absolutely is), but also the source of your union with Christ. And that union can transform your body so it pulsates with a new life and love stronger than lust.
- Don’t give up. You’re up against an enemy who’d like you to believe that defeat is inevitable. He uses your repeated failures as evidence that resistance is futile. But it’s all war-time propaganda devised to dishearten you. Where he taunts you with your failures (even if the failures are recent or embarrassing or many), turn again to the cross. Your hope rests not in your righteousness but in the righteousness of Christ. His body broken for you, His blood shed for you. As He Himself said, “Take, eat, all of you.” The difference between those who overcome and those who don’t often boils down simply to whether or not a person is willing to keep coming back.
So much is at stake. Keep fighting. You were made for Christ, not for porn. You can do this.
Question: What am I missing? What else helps you in your battle against lust and pornography? Leave a comment below.
With you and for you,
You answer this question a dozen times a day. At least your heart does. And how your heart answers impacts everything.
(This is why the enemy goes after your heart’s view of who you are relentlessly.)
Just to be clear, your heart thinks about you on a more profound level than your bio on Facebook or what you say during the get-to-know-you portion of a typical Church small group.
Your heart answers in ideas and images, sometimes incomplete, often imperceptible. And yet, as much as these may fly under the radar of your everyday awareness, how your heart answers will manifest in other ways.
- John is successful on all fronts. He’s respected at work, in his neighborhood, and at church. And he’s been involved in a series of secret extra-marital affairs for years.
- Judy is a star on the track team, made honor roll every year, and is a leader in her youth group. And at night in her room, she’s viewing porn and visiting chat rooms in ways she hopes no one ever discovers.
- May is super involved in her church’s inner-city outreach, volunteering to help in any way she can. And her emotions rise or fall based on the affirmation she does or doesn’t receive from the leaders in her church.
- Tim is a pastor who loves his congregation. Many in his church share enthusiastically how much Tim has influenced their lives for good. Often when Tim drives home after Sunday services, he ruminates on how well or poorly he feels his sermon went.
Long-standing faulty beliefs undermine our best efforts to live the lives God intends for us. Without getting to these deep-seated beliefs, change and growth will be hindered. Biblical precepts, practical strategies, solid accountability, and all the know-how in the world can be trumped by hidden faulty beliefs a person carries about him or herself.
So what can be done?
1. Acknowledge you have deep-seated beliefs about yourself. We all do, and they’re not all true.
2. Begin asking, “Father, reveal the faulty ideas and images I carry of myself.” Take time with this. Sometimes these things trace back to early childhood.
3. As He reveals faulty beliefs, press them into Christ on the cross. He bore our faulty identities so we could come to know who we really are in Him.
4. Ask the Father to tell you the truth about who you are. As your Creator, He knows. Take time with this as well, write down what you hear. Be assured, what He says will be thoroughly biblical, and yet He knows the language of your heart, so don’t be surprised if He speaks to you in ways or times you don’t expect. (One of the most meaningful things God has spoken to me about who I am was in the middle of an action movie, of all places.)
You’ll need help with these. Find a trusted friend, mentor, or advisor who can pray, listen, and discern with you.
When I first started coming to Regeneration to break free from lust, I read a lot. And it was incredibly helpful. But it wasn’t near enough.
At least since the enlightenment, we’ve operated under the ideology that knowledge is our most important need.
And it is incredibly important. Even so, we can (and I believe we do) elevate it higher than it deserves. This is where I found myself in my own journey.
Knowing the ins and outs of what was going on for me, knowing quality strategies to replace my negative behavior with positive alternatives, understanding why I was returning to these sins again and again, and even knowing applicable Scripture passages, all of it was tremendous for me. Yet it fell short. I was confounded how I could know so much and still return willingly to my sin.
There’s something far more important.
This is why Paul wrote that “knowledge puffs up, but love builds up” and that if I have all knowledge but not love, “I am nothing.”
And even more to the point, this is why, when God sought to rescue us, He didn’t send helpful articles, or start a blog, or even remind us again how important it is to read our Bibles (which, to be clear, it is).
He came to us.
There’s a difference between learning about God and getting to know God, between learning God’s truth and becoming one with Him.
What the law could not do, perfect as it was, Christ did. He came near, lived with, dwelt among. Gave Himself to become one with us. This is what the gospel is about—union with Jesus Himself. The vine and the branches speaks to this, baptism is all about this, and so is the last supper.
And this is why the image God uses most throughout Scripture to convey His desired relationship with us is not Teacher and student (one conveying information to another), but Bridegroom and bride (one uniting himself with another, giving his life to her, even pouring his life into her). He means for us to be “naked” with Him, to spend time with Him, to get to know Him and to be known by Him, intimately.
This is His desire with you. He’s inviting you nearer even now. You’ll need grace. He gives it. You’ll need faith. He has that, too.
This is what I want. And oh how I forget it and too often settle for knowing about Him. Jesus, have mercy. I want to know You.
I’d love to hear your thoughts: What are ways other believers have helped point you to or usher you into the presence of Christ?
Wanting to know,
My 6-year old recently decided he was going to learn to juggle.
He started out enthusiastic, confident. Within an hour, he was rolling on the floor, crying, “I can’t do it! I can’t do it! I’ll never be able to juggle!”
The absurdity of his premature despair almost made the scene laughable.
Sometime later, God casually asked me, “You know you do the same thing, right?”
There are several areas of my life I expected would be different by this point. And some days it feels tempting to accept this is just the way things are, rather than to persevere, to grow, to pray, to hope.
- It’s hard to keep praying when the sky’s been cloudless for years.
- Hard to watch the horizon, when your prodigal left for a far country so long ago.
- Hard to conceive your brother will live, when he’s been dead for three days.
Doesn’t humility demand we accept that some things will never change?
No. Not humility. It’s pride that stands before the eternal Creator and His resurrected Son and declares, “Never.”
One of the greatest deceptions of the enemy is twisting God’s Not Yet into a Not Ever. We, on the other hand, keep our eyes on the crucified and resurrected One, and exchange despair’s Not Ever for God’s Not Yet.
Throughout the pages of Scripture, this is exactly what God’s faithful did.
For some, the Yes they’d waited for came while they walked the earth (see Heb. 11:32 – 34). For others it came after death (see Heb. 11:35 – 40).
Doesn’t humility demand we accept that some things will never change? No. Not humility. It’s pride that stands before the eternal Creator and His resurrected Son and declares, “Never.”
Not yet is, in essence, what Jesus answered his disciples when they urged him to assume his place as king (Mt. 16:21-23, Lk. 9:51-56).
And the Father must have been whispering something like, “Not yet,” to Jesus when he was tempted with a shortcut in the desert (Mt. 4:8 – 10) and a way out in the garden (Lk. 22:39-44).
A few months ago, I got an email from Steve. I first met Steve in 1999. In his forties, he’d felt homosexual desires most of his life. He participated actively in Regeneration groups for a few years and made good progress, deepening his relationship with Christ, experiencing healing for some past wounds, and gaining freedom from acting upon his homosexual urges. His homosexual desires remained, however, which was a disappointment to him. More than a decade passed.
In his recent email, he told me his homosexual attractions were finally gone: “Nothing specific and nothing special happened to mark the occasion of my deliverance from same-sex attraction. It just happened . . . As for when, it’s been several years, now. At first, I told no one and kept it to myself to make sure it was real. Gladly I can tell you, it is.”
I don’t know why God chooses to do miracles in some areas of our lives and not yet in other areas, why he chooses healing for some and not yet for others.
What will you do? Will you keep walking, keep asking, keep knocking?
- Though you’ve never gone a week without it, keep seeking freedom from lust.
- Though the fairy tale is ended, keep praying for love like Christ’s in your marriage.
- Though every ‘happily ever after’ around you includes a couple, keep seeking contentment in Christ as a celibate single.
- Though you’ve stumbled a thousand times, keep getting back up.
- Though everyone around you seems to find a shortcut, take up your cross daily and follow.
When the veil of time is removed, when eternity rolls out before us and our lives on earth seem no longer than a few minutes, when we stand before the One who suffered for us and rose again, how many of us will seem like little children who threw ourselves down on the floor after only an hour?
O Lord, grant us to be faithful.
Where are you still waiting? Leave a comment below.
As we approached the field, I noticed several little boys in baseball caps, pants and cleats. It was my 6-year-old son’s first ever baseball practice. A pace or two behind me, he wore beat up tennis shoes, a pair of jeans, and the glove I’d bought him (which suddenly looked more to me like a toy than an actual mitt).
Like it has for so many years, fear sidled up like a friend beside me. “Dressed like that, he’s going to look and feel foolish.”
I looked back at my boy who was now bent over trying to tie his shoe. Fear goaded, “And he’s going to be late, too.”
Somewhere in just this short walk, insecurities from my past came flooding up, fueling my anxious father’s heart. I yelled, “Come on! Hurry up and tie your shoe or you’ll be late!” My voice was seeping fret and frustration.
He fumbled with his laces. I winced. Little fingers don’t respond well to a parent’s urgency.
Sometime early in my life, fear came knocking like a door-to-door salesman. Seeming to know me well, it promised its protection in exchange for a home with me.
I don’t remember making this bargain. But looking back, I can see the evidence of it smudged all over my life like greasy fingerprints on a mirror: All the things I didn’t do, the relationships I ran from, the thoughts I held inside, the good image of myself I tried to project.
And now, harassed by fear that Saturday morning on the way to baseball, I turned fear loose on my boy.
Graciously, the Father edged closer than fear. He affirmed me and called forth something more in me than I was aware I had.
Like a man waking from sleep, I remembered the truth that all that had my attention isn’t what gives a kid confidence. A father does.
Still tying his shoe, I looked again. What a great boy. What a joy to be his father. Fear didn’t want me to see. God did.
“You know what, buddy? I’m sorry I raised my voice. We’re doing just fine on time. And you’re going to have a great practice today, I’m sure of it.”
I can’t guarantee my son a life free from pain. But I can walk with him. And I can point him to the courageous One who, with the Cross before him, felt greater fear than either of us ever will, and still obeyed.
If you’re in the Baltimore area, I hope you’ll join us this Thursday from 7 – 8:30 in Towson for our final night of our “Growing Digital Natives” seminar. Elise Rittler, LGPC, will be speaking to us about how to handle anxiety in your home. Elise’s insights have been a huge gift to many, myself included. I know they will be for you and your family, too. For more information or to register, click here.
Question: Has fear tried to keep you from seeing and loving others well? How have you responded? Leave a comment below.
I’m a digital immigrant. I remember my family’s first PC. It took up half the desk, the printer was as loud as the dishwasher, and when it was first set up, we crowded around to see the rectangle, green cursor as it blinked against the dark grey screen like a robot dog awaiting a command.
My kids are digital natives. They’re growing up in a home with six computers, some of which can fit in their pockets. For them, it’s more of a phenomenon when something with a screen isn’t connected to the Internet than when it is.
And just like immigrant parents raising their kids in a foreign land, my wife and I have to think carefully and creatively about how we’re raising our kids in this new world. We want them to be able to thrive here, to be fluent in the language, to be employable, and to be able to build relationships.
We’re also the keepers of all that’s good from the land we grew up in. There are good traditions and ideals that our kids can’t remember and won’t get naturally in today’s world without us.
And we’ve got to balance these (sometimes competing) realities all the while we nurture our relationships with kids whose normal is not so normal for us.
Jesus is our model in this. The culture in which he walked the earth was rich with tradition—some good, some neutral, and some bad. Certainly what he experienced was different from the Kingdom that had been his home. Some of the differences he adjusted to (Lk. 20:22-25), others he quietly opted to do differently (Mt. 9:11, Jn. 13:5), some he corrected (Mt. 23:23, Lk. 6:1-5), and some he actively sought to change (Mk. 10:42-45, Lk. 18:15-17).
I heard recently from a parent who said it’s the norm at his kid’s high school for a guy to text a girl when he wants to ask her out. In the world I grew up in, that would have been an act of disrespect and cowardice. Maybe that’s not universally true anymore.
So what are my choices as a parent? I can rant about it, I can insist my kids do it the old-fashioned way, or I can throw my hands up because I just don’t get “kids these days.”
Here’s another option: I can drill down to the essence of what I really want for my kids and go after those things. This involves prayerful discernment to recognize where I resist the digital world because it’s bad and where I resist the digital world because it’s different.
So if the norms in the digital world are different than what I grew up with, my kids can teach me that. My job isn’t to hold them back from knowing and operating within the cultural norms in this new land, my job is to look for teachable moments in this new world (yes, even online) to help instill the ideals my wife and I hold dear.
So looking at the example above, underneath the act of asking a girl out face to face, I’m after seeing certain characteristics instilled in my son:
Yes, secretly, I’m still hoping when my son reaches high school the culture holds to (or revives) the good old custom of a guy asking a girl out face to face. But whether it does or doesn’t, I can be about the business of helping my son grow to become a good godly young man who practices courage, vulnerability, respect, and service.
Hey, if you didn’t join us last week for the first week of our mini-series on Parenting in a Digital Age, I hope you’ll join us this week. Click here for more information or to register.
One more thought: As nostalgic as we may get for the “good old days,” our true Home isn’t there any more than it’s here in the digital age. As disciples of Christ, we were strangers and aliens then no less than we are now.
Share your thoughts below.
Old and crotchety,